UNPREDICTABLE BEHAVIORS PRODUCE UNEXPECTED PROFITS!

Lean In To Your WEIRD!!!

When you BREAK LOOSE and step into the FULLNESS OF DEVIANCE™ you – YES, YOU – can profit not only financially, but on a VIBRATIONAL AND COSMIC LEVEL!

By disobeying THEIR LAWS™ and twisting your presence into their SOFT WAYS OF DOING THINGS “RIGHT,” you naturally attract, call in and organize other truth-seekers, freaks, malcontents and Superior Mutants JUST LIKE YOU!

Explore the ZEN OF STUPIDITY!

Follow your follies and compulsions to a land of riches and that soul-satisfying TINGLING SENSATION YOU GET ONLY FROM TELLING THE MARKETING WORLD TO LICK YOUR NUT SACK!!!*

Stop Playing It Safe Like THEM!

Step Out of Line!

*I mean that in the metaphorical sense. You may or may not have a nut sack. Whatever. Also, if you have a tingling sensation in your nut sack, get that checked out. I’m not a doctor, but that’s prolly not good.

Who It’s For

YOU WANT TO STAND OUT AND BE RECOGNIZED (AND PAID) FOR YOUR ABJECT UNCOMMONNESS!

Can’t Get There If You Care Too Hard!!!

Get beyond what THEY think! Find a hole in their logic and patterns and put your {body part name} in there and wiggle it around!

Are you looking for an excuse? Are you holding back because “I’M TOO WEIRD/NOT WEIRD ENOUGH?” This will get you over that crapola and help you create a brand that gives you an excuse to be you – and to be being unflinchingly CORRECT ALL THE TIME BECAUSE YOU ARE THE CORRECT!

YES! THAT’S RIGHT! BRANDTAGONISM IS YOUR ALL-ENCOMPASSING and ETERNAL EXCUSE TO FREAK OUT AND SAY ALL THE THINGS THEY SAID YOU SHOULDN’T!!!

It’s for people who are ready to actually stand out by taking the easy route of being precisely how insanely weird* they are… EVERYWHERE AND WITH STYLE, GRACE AND EASE!!!

You’re Not Regular!

Bust Loose, You Beautiful Mutant!

*You’re weird. You know you are. We’re all weird. Time to face up to the facts, buttercup. You’re as jacked up as ME. HA HA HA! YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE NORMAL… cute.

What You Get

YOUR BRAIN WILL HURT AND YOU‘LL WALK AWAY WITH A DIVINE FIRE LIT UNDER THE RUMP OF YOUR BRAND, OR MY NAME ISN’T NOT UNCLE JIMBO™

Satisfaction Guaranteed or You Can Come Sleep On My Couch!

$333

CHEAP!

ONE HOUR*

We’ll Zoom, I’ll give you “The Speech” that will dispel every marketing myth you’ve ever bought into – in 3 minutes or less.

We’ll run over where you’re having blocks in standing out and discuss how to get beyond those into a land where differentiation flows like bum wee on a dumpster.

I’ll give you PROVEN techniques to make your content loud and more attractive – no matter your niche.

Speaking of niches! I’ll define ways for you to stand out from YOUR crowd. Bespoke and just for your hot little hands. It’s a lot easier than you think – even if you’re not a psychotic, aging weirdo like me.

Want some guerilla tactics and algo boosting tomfoolery? We can get there, too.

It’ll be a jam-packed call, so bring water and adult undergarments.

5 Days

When you sign up, I’ll send you an invite to a way to communicate with me directly for 5 days. This isn’t FB messenger, and it’s not to shoot the breeze and complain about the price of decent coffee. No, we’ll fire ideas back and forth. Ask questions – solve problems. Aaaaaaaand probably tell awful (funny) jokes.

Zero Scarcity

I can only do a few of these at a time. If you see space on the calendar below, you better grab it. I’ll just block out the time when my schedule is too full. First come, first served.

Ready to Bend The Rules o’ Reality?

It’s Your Time to Get It ON!!!

*I’m not putting a timer on this. We’ll hang out and talk about all the things. If it gets out of hand, I’ll let you know – but… we’re adults. You know what my time is worth and likewise. Figure on an hour – it could be more. It’s rarely less. All that said, the more organized you come into the meeting, the more ground we can cover.

Why Uncle Jimbo™

I’ve been building brands, large and small, for 30 years. Don’t let my youthful appearance fool you.

You’ve heard it a million times – you have to stand out. It’s true. But how?

I have ways. I’d like to give you those ways in exchange for a few American Dollars.

You can see some of my work and words and things people say about me and other stuff by clicking here.

Let’s Do It

$333

CHEAP!

Pick your date and time, pay the money and we’ll do the thing.

Once you’re signed up, I’ll get in touch for the 5 questions thingy.

James PM Gaffney
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