Building a Monster
That Was Going To Kill Me

The year is 1999.

A fresh-ish faced and cock-eyedly optimistic Jimbo strikes out on his own to conquer the world through design. It works pretty well. He makes good money, meets cool people, has a good time. It’s not perfect – but it operates for 18 years with Jimbo behind the scenes. Even with staff, it’s still all Jimbo, but he’s not the face.

Then, in 2017, Jimbo and his nuclear clan sell everything and set off on an RV trip of 18 months. The business has to change since it’s now mobile, so Jimbo decides he’ll change. He’ll be the face of the franchise, as it were.

“Build a personal brand” they said.

“Get out front” they admonished.

“Talk about your expertise” they droned.

And Jimbo listened.

Jimbo starts to market himself as an expert.

Of course, he heard mostly what he wanted and went about things in his own stilted and weird way. But…

It started working. Sort of. The old business flags while Jimbo rebuilds himself into (what amounts to) an online marketer, but this is The New Way.

After a few years with his feet dangling in this pool, Jimbo decided it was time to jump in. He was going full on online Hustlebrah.

He started assembling the parts – the courses, the videos, the platforms, the email lists, the… all the things.

He started noticing that there were blocks. Emotional. Psychic.

He would build these things…

Things he really didn’t want to do.

Things he didn’t want to support.

To sell to people who didn’t get it.

Or people he didn’t like.

More years go by. Periods of success. Periods of failure. An overarching feeling of something just… off.

Then came The Gamhain Eiercode.

Easily the dumbest idea that Jimbo has had.

And this is the man who has invented such things as Drink Hot Piss, FuckSoup, The Spiritual Fence Co., Leather Daddy Branding and other malfeasance towards humanity in the form of branding.

It came from Jimbo making an egg sandwich and looking at the carton of eggs. There 6 left. Jimbo buys eggs in cartons of 24, as Jimbo eats a lot of eggs.

As the hero of this story rearranged the eggs in the carton to be aesthetically pleasing, he got to thinking: How many different ways could these be arranged in this carton?

Much math and coffee later, the answer came back: 134,596.

So, Jimbo did what any rational egg-loving man would do: He published a book of all the configurations, built a system of cataloging human emotion based on these configurations, built a church, a company, a story, a cast of characters and an entire subfictional universe around the concept.

The Gamhain Eiercode.

More on the name at some point.

But – what this has done for Jimbo is given him a better understanding of what he wanted. Not marketing. Not more people.

More freedom.

More creativity.

More reckless freedom in creativity.

The Gamhain Eiercode is an autobiography. Complete.

So, Jimbo decided that Eiercode and his employment at Gamhain Eiercode GmbH will be his new (and ultimate grift.)

He will service his current clients. He will eschew the Hustlebrah community. He will shun those who expect him to stay the same.

He will exist to serve the mission of The Church of the Calf.

He will continue to publish ridiculous books, including The 12 Books of the Second Corpus of the Gamhain Eiercode.

He will continue to design things.

But he has walked away from the marketing game.

He’s not your guru.

He’s not your coach.

He’s not your best friend.

He’s The Compiler.